Vegan ‘No Pork’ Pies

Brand: Morrisons

Cost: £3

Found at: Morrisons

I have always insisted (and quite loudly, too) that to truly enjoy vegan food, you need to stop trying to re-create non-vegan dishes. Stop trying to make meat happen, Gretchen. It’s not going to happen.

After all, there are SO many incredible dishes out there that are inherently vegan and inherently delicious, and I always saw bean burgers and tofurkeys as a bit of a cop-out. I saw vegan non-meats as a failure to engage with the deliciously diverse flavors and textures that vegetables had to offer. I told everyone who would listen that fake meats were inevitably a poor imitation of something else, and therefore, that non-meats gave vegan cuisine a bad reputation of being bland and boring non-food. I was honestly a bit of a jerk about it.

But times have changed, and with the help of these no-pork pies, I am willing to admit that I may have been overzealous. Don’t get me wrong, the wide world of vegetable goodness is still out there waiting to be discovered, but meat substitutes have come a long way since the seitan horrors of my youth. These no-pork pies, for example. I was stunned to find that they taste exactly like a regular pork pie. In flavor, texture, color, and smell, I would not be able to tell the difference, and more importantly, they are absolutely delicious! I was genuinely delighted to discover how good these were and honestly, I think I may prefer them over the meat versions. They are oniony and savory and flaky and steam just the right amount when you cut into them: they maybe a little more expensive but holy smokes are they good.

And as we move into a new decade, and try to navigate a new, more sustainable way of living, it’s encouraging to know that the future will still include pork pies. Sure, I’m all for the hippie, utopian, New World Order (after all, I made my own shampoo one time) but I’ve also just discovered the joys of meat pies and would be loathed to lose them so soon.