Enjoy the things you can afford
Brand: Kettle Cost: £0.90 Found at: Sainsbury’s Being ladies of great refinement and taste, cruelly underfinanced for the lavish lifestyle to which we wish we could become accustomed, several female classmates and I took decided to visit Pollok house for the weekend to bask in a state of refinement. The house itself is a... Continue Reading →
Brand: Morrison’s Cost: £1.30 Found at: Morrison’s Pork pies are one of those things that I had always assumed were fictional. I had only ever heard about them in nursery rhymes, along with giants, magic beans and women living in shoes, and so I assumed that these pies were just another colorful piece of... Continue Reading →
Brand: Morrison’s Cost: £1.00 Found at: Morrison’s Every day, I try to take a little time out to be grateful for having been born in the era of hipster nonsense. Sure, I have to put up with such silly things as puppuccinos, edible bentonite clay, and monetized Whole 30 Instagram accounts, but life is about... Continue Reading →
Brand: McVitie’s Cost: £1.50 Found at: Morrisons We live in a time where I can access the combined knowledge of humanity from my cozy bedroom; a time of facial recognition, virtual reality, 3D printing, robotic surgery, privatized space travel, cryptocurrency, drones, and a thousand podcasts about serial killers. And yet somehow, in this amazing,... Continue Reading →
Brand: Sainsbury’s Cost: £1.35 Found at: Sainsbury’s I don’t know what makes this luxury. The packaging is a little fancier, and there is a little more deep-fried ground pork around my boiled egg, but it is not as if I bit in and thought I’d won the lottery. It tastes exactly the same as a... Continue Reading →
This is an egg, wrapped in ground pork, breaded, and deep-fried. I love it. The name of the game is cholesterol and I am HERE TO WIN. There is not much seasoning, but it turns out that seasoning is not necessary: with enough pork fat and salt, there is plenty of flavor to go around.... Continue Reading →
Brand: UK British Pork Cost: £1 Found at: Sainsbury’s This sausage roll has all the flavor of an unseasoned, grey tube of meat wrapped in dry puff pastry. Because that is what it is. A grey, flavorless cylinder of pork off-cuts that has been unceremoniously shoved into a stale pie curst package. Where is... Continue Reading →
Brand: Tunnock’s Cost: £1 Found at: Sainsbury’s I arrived in Scotland as I arrive in every new country: jetlagged, bewildered and smelling of sweat and sleeplessness. Just because I travel a lot does not mean that I travel well. And the last thing I wanted upon my arrival was a new experience: I wanted a... Continue Reading →
Brand: Marabou Cost: 10.95KR Found at: Coop This chocolate bar has tiny little Tuc crackers in it. Not cracker crumbs or crunchy cracker fragments, but whole, miniature Tuc crackers. It is possibly the most adorable chocolate I have ever seen. Now, I love Tuc crackers on their own – they are crunchy and salty... Continue Reading →
