Passionfruit

Cost: 6.95KR

Found at: Coop

I’d heard about passionfruit before. In fact, I’d assumed that I’d eaten it before. It is the kind of thing you hear about – the kind of thing which other things are flavored as: passionfruit gum, passionfruit ice cream, 2-in-1 passionfruit hair shampoo and revitalizer. It seemed unlikely that I could have gone through so much of life and never really encountered the thing itself. But as soon as I saw this shriveled, grotesque, purple excuse for a fruit at the Swedish grocery store, I knew for certain that this was our first encounter. I would have remembered if I had seen it before.

I don’t know what my mental image of a passionfruit was, but it had to have been something tropical and exotic and alluring – the kind of thing you would pick off a colorful tree along a sandy Hawaiian beach. But this thing does not look at all like that. This thing looks like an alien egg – something that has been left too long on the fruit display or in the back of the fridge. It is hard and rubbery and completely unlike anything I would ever want to eat. I was sure that there had to have been some serious translation error when this could be marketed as passionfruit.

But because I cannot resist the opportunity to eat something weird, I bought it. And I cannot say that further inspection brought me any comfort. Sliced in half, this fruit revealed a slimy yellow interior straight out of Stranger Things. Its seeds are encased in pods of opaque yellow liquid and the fruit’s interior has the veiny, spiky look of an intestine or unhealthy gland. I will never believe that this fruit is from Earth and is not an accidental transplant from some other planet. But that being said, it did taste good. It’s sweet and very tart and just a little bit bitter – something that would go perfect with ice-cream. I just hope that it keeps its activities to the strictly gourmet and does not branch out into other endeavors – world domination, as a completely random example.

Though I, myself, would welcome our zesty overlords.